Being Introverted and Being on the Internet

I’m a pretty introverted person in real life. Spending time with friends and family is great and I love doing it, but sometimes I get pretty exhausted when I hang out with them. It’s nothing to do with them!

As an introvert, energy comes from being alone and doing my own thing. While I’m not a recluse, I do spend a majority of my time alone and when I do I feel revitalized.

So you would think that being on the Internet would counteract some of that energy because I’m not physically out doing something with people. Sadly, that’s not the case.

What usually happens is that I engage and interact with people. I comment on posts. I tweet. I do a lot of things on the Internet. And even though I’m not really seeing people in real life and using my own voice, I’ve been feeling pretty low energy.

That’s why you sometimes see days without posts and weeks where I take a break.

It’s gotten to a point where I’m taking longer breaks in order to feel better. I stop reading and writing and just focus on playing video games or watching The Bachelor. I post my photo and then don’t return back to the photo until much later in the day on Instagram. It’s not because I’m too busy, but because I just don’t want to engage right now. Because I’m too tired from chatting, which feels sad to me.

And sadly, the Internet doesn’t really let you do that. Instead, you have to engage and you have to keep up because the sites we use require it from their users. If you want to build a following, you need to constantly be talking to them. It makes sense, but for a user like me, it’s exhausting.

So what do you do when you’re tired of engaging and want to take a break? You risk your own mental health or your Internet following?

In my opinion, an Internet following doesn’t mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Stuff like your mental health means much more than how many people like your post. I don’t want to abandon my friends or discourage anyone from posting, but my mental health is very precarious and when it’s not high, then I’m low.

So how do you combat this feeling of low energy? Here’s how I do it:

Turn off business features for your Instagram.

I had my business account on Instagram for a year and honestly, the only insights it gave me was whether or not people liked my posts or didn’t. I didn’t find it helpful in any other way than that. Maybe it was helpful to find out when my followers were on IG the most, but that was about it.

Instead, I found myself obsessing over numbers and making me weary that I’m not doing enough to engage with the community. I decided to turn off business features.

Ever since I did that, I feel like I can be myself a little bit more. Yeah, I won’t be able to swipe up on stuff, but that’s okay. I still have people who go to my link in the bio because I can see that conversion on my blog.

Worry less on who isn’t liking you and focus more on the people you interact with daily.

As everyone knows, engagement is really important on social media. You have to speak with your public and they will speak back and you will make friendships. If this isn’t your thing, then this will be exceptionally tough for you.

However, you don’t have to talk to everyone! Curate your social media to your likes and your favorites so that you’re always inundated with great posts and content that you’ll enjoy. This will make the energy sapping much easier.

Don’t stress out if someone with a million followers isn’t talking to you. That’s okay! They have busy lives or they can’t make it to the Internet to chat. Instead, focus on the people that you do talk to everyday. They’re the ones that truly care about you and want to get to know you, your brand, and everything you do. It’s a much better experience hanging out with your friends everyday than pleasing strangers.

Break up your screen time to small chunks throughout the day

I realized that I can spend all day on social media if I wanted to. While for some that’s their full-time job, for me it’s pretty energy draining to stare at your phone all day. The worst is when you look at your phone and make comparisons of your work with others. It’s something that I do often and a bad habit.

So what I end up doing is breaking up my time on Instagram into small chunks. Every few hours, I hop on for about fifteen to thirty minutes, make a few comments, chat back with a few people, and then I get off again. Breaking up my time has seriously helped my mood and brought my focus back to other things I wanted to do.

Designate a time at night to stop engaging all together

I am a strong believer that once the day is done, then work is over. That’s why you may not see me after a certain hour at night chatting online The reason is that I like to spend my evenings with myself. I watch some TV, enjoy dinner, and maybe read a book. After 9 or 10 PM, I put my phone down for the rest of the evening. Unless I’m playing Candy Crush, I try not to pick my phone up again until the next day.

The time spent offline has really helped my mental health improve and give me the space I need away from my Internet friends. Prior to the Internet, we were all spending quality time with our families after work or after dinner. I like to keep that up because if you don’t,  you can be engaging with people and finding stuff on the Internet forever.

 

10 thoughts on “Being Introverted and Being on the Internet

  1. A wonderful post! I’m an introvert as well, and find what you said to be true (though I didn’t realize that’s why I felt the way I did about blogging sometimes!). While I love the relationships I’m cultivating online, sometimes I feel really burnt out, but I don’t feel like I can take a break without my already barely alive blog going completely dark. It’s an odd place to be.

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  2. OMG, this is me. I still don’t understand how I can get emotionally-drained from writing/typing/responding/interacting online… but I do! And then if I spend a considerable amount of time “online” doing this, I feel even more closed-off and introverted, and it becomes difficult for me to then interact / go out and socialise. I, also, try to limit social media use (alerts turned off, apps parked on the “last screen” of my phone). I’m better at it somedays than others!

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  3. this is so important! i always wanted to try something like this – i don’t chat a lot on internet (i don’t even use fb anymore!), what i use the most is instagram and twitter, and i try a lot to use less.
    i wanted to get offline all day, if i could… but the only person i talk a looot is my boyfriend, and we don’t live together yet. its hard because of this – i miss talk to him all the time.
    what would you do in a case like this?
    xx

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  4. This is a really great post and I could really connect with a lot of things you were saying. I’m always worried that if I don’t respond right away and stay on top of social media, I’ll lose the connections I’ve worked hard to establish. I definitely like the idea of setting a time at night where you just stop engaging; it’s something I’ve been meaning to do!

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  5. I can totally relate! ‘m a big introvert and too much interaction or engagement is not my cup of tea. I try too hard to be active everywhere all the time but it’s too draining and just upsets me at the end of it all because of course, I’m not able to engage everywhere all the time. I loved this post! ❤

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  6. So relateable! I notice a cycle with my need for a break, it usually comes around the winter time. So I completely disconnected (this round it was for over 3 months!)- no reviews, no Instagram. I didn’t come back until I felt inspired to write again and to engage in the dreaded way Instagram requires. I lost quite a few followers and I’m still struggling to get back to where I was at the beginning of Fall, but I’m okay with it! I have a busy “real” life outside of my “internet” life and that has to take priority! I some times wonder how those people do it who are constantly engaged.. my head would explode 🙂 🙂

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  7. I’m with you and, while it’s not totally exhausting to me to interact a lot online, it’s not how I want to spend my time. I don’t want to spend hours out of my day commenting back and forth on Instagram. And, my life means I’m only in front of my computer a few times throughout the day, rather than all day long (I don’t have a desk job).

    While this does mean I have way less Instagram followers than some other book bloggers, I’m okay with that.

    Hang in there and do what’s best for the whole you!

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  8. I love this post! I am just getting started with my own book blog and I find engaging with others and using social media to be the most difficult part. I’m generally on the shyer side and it’s totally against my nature to go on the internet and promote myself. When it gets hard, I’m definitely going to come back and give this post another read. Thank you!

    Like

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