February 2019’s Mid-Month Checkin

February 2019’s Mid-Month Checkin

I hate to admit it, but February hasn’t been kind to me. We’re now in the middle of the month and my reading hasn’t been going so well. I’ve read…one book.

In some small way, I’m angry. I’m angry at myself for not focusing and reading as much as I can. I’m angry that I’ve put down two books this month and struggling to get through another book right now. What is with me?

As a book blogger, there aren’t many breaks you can take. You take a break from blogging and it’s like you didn’t even exist. You take a break from reading and the books just keep piling up on your nightstand before it all tumbles down. So taking a break feels a little cumbersome.

As a reader, this frustrates me. I want to read. I sit down with my tea and snacks and my book and I make a concerted effort to read, but I end up on my phone. I end up talking to my husband. I end up playing video games and the book goes another day without a page being turned.

I know I should be kind to myself, but if I’m being honest I haven’t been in a good space mentally for a month now. I’ve been stressed from finding a job and it’s put me off from reading books. I’m not a control person, but I do try to keep myself together. I feel like someone who put buttercream too soon after the cakes came out the oven. I’m melting in a way and just trying to push myself together and it’s not working.

So right now my slump is looking pretty disastrous and I wanted to be honest about that here. Things aren’t going as planned and my brain just needs the rest. I’ll be back next week, I think.

What have you read this month so far?